[day 19: lonely]

ok, from my last couple of posts, you would think i'm
depressed.
i'm here to tell you, i'm not at all.

in fact, i am happier right now than i have been in weeks. i am working on a lot of things, but i am so happy! i can honestly say i love my life.

regardless, i've been thinking about
[loneliness]
today.

how many people in this world feel lonely?
how many people in my college feel lonely?
how many people that i know of feel lonely?
how many friends feel lonely?


[let me tell you...there are lots]

don't get me wrong,
i've had my share of lonely days this year,
[shed a couple tears in the bookstore]
but the idea of being lonely in college is somewhat
of a phenomenon.
every [single] one of us is constantly surrounded by
a sea of people, and [so] many of us feel so alone.
my grandma told me that college is the only time
that she has truly felt alone in such a large group of people.
and i totally agree!

feeling alone is so hard.
whether it be because you are trying to do what's right,
because you are studying like a crazy person,
or because you haven't found your group yet,
it is one of the hardest things. ever.

after graduation, almost every relationship
we have changes.

people move away, you move away, and people change.
you change.
there are so many changes your freshmen year
that make it really really [really] hard.
friends go on missions, and you start your own.

i think one of the biggest changes is your stability.
in high school, most of us know where we fit.
you have a group of people and you can call them
almost any time and ask "hey where you at?"
then, you make plans, and it's [at most] a 10 minute
drive to your friends.

from there, you all work together to make
that day an adventure.

in college, there have been [very] few times
when i have been able to call up my friends,
get together,
and make up a plan from there.

one of those [favorite] times was last weekend.
those who were present know what i mean.
it was one of the best nights i've had in so long.
[you can read a post about it below this one]
ooh, it was great. epic, even.

but, for those who feel lonely,
just remember you are never [truly] alone.
when you feel completely alone,
think of your parents, your family,
and those that are important to you.
the reason those people are important to you
is because they have given love to you
one way or another. that's why they're still in your life, right?

when you feel alone because you are
always the one dishing out the advice and care,
and you want just a little bit,
try and remember how much good you are doing
for that person.

hopefully, that person will be able to pay it forward, and they'll call and help you some day.

but, if that never happens, just remember that you are still very loved.

if you need a friend, feel free to call me.
i'll do what i can.

i want everyone to feel the same love that i do.
i am so lucky to experience the reciprocation of love that i do.

just think of the lady antebellum song "never alone"
you really are never alone.
[for those of you who haven't heard it, look it up]

[right now]

be happy, keep calm, and carry on.
know that you're loved.

over and out